Sorry.

I am a kid. I’m stupid sometimes. I have been raised Jewish so when I was attacked by some for not agreeing with pure matrilineal lineage I fought back. I have reflected and realised I want to go through the actual process. I have reached out to an orthodox synagogue and all. I’m sorry for being just idiotic. But some people were cruel, I think they forgot I am not a system to be analysed but am a real person who is struggling with my mental health, but I know I’m Zera Yisrael. I want to become Am Yisrael. I am ethnically and culturally Jewish and I hope to eventually be religiously Jewish. Great is HaShem for helping me realise. Please give me some key advice and also I have read to Exodus even tho I have ADHD. Again I’m sorry and thanks!