Hello!
Before I continue, we do have a meeting with a rabbi in place to ask these questions. That is in a few weeks, and I am just curious to crowdsource some ideas and options.
My partner and I are having a non religious ceremony with my brother officiating. For context, I grew up in a agnostic/reconstructionist household and he in a reform house. Neither of us are very religious now, but we hold our Jewish values and community very close to our hearts and incorporating certain traditions is important to us.
My first question is about the Ketubah. We will not have a rabbi present/signing it (and have found an egalitarian text that fits us). I know traditionally it is signed by non relatives, but we were thinking of having our fathers sign. Is that a big no? I also don’t love the idea of signing it before the ceremony. We will be doing a first look, and I want to keep the first look just between us and not have our officiant/witnesses there. Has anyone signed it after? Or the day prior at the rehearsal?
Last question I would love some brainstorming on… Our dream venue we booked is a historic greenhouse that doesn’t allow any decor, including a chuppah. I have always dreamed of getting married under a chuppah. My first thought is to have us sign the kettubah under the chuppa outside the greenhouse, but open to other suggestions as well! One idea is to have our friends hold it (technical loophole with our venue lol).
Overall, curious to hear how couples who are not/did not have a religious ceremony incorporate traditions 🙂 Thanks!
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