[Update] I’m too embarrassed to ask the rabbi this

ORIGINAL:

I have to pay for my master’s degree out of pocket which is like £500/mo the problem is I’m also in a lot of debt because I’m American. Anyway, the only way to afford my debts and pay for my masters (I do not qualify for a private loan right now) is to work gig jobs (culinary, warehousing, or engineering) on Shabbat. My question is, should I see it more fit that I keep Shabbat and I should have bitachon that it will work out or do I be more realistic and look at my budget and say yes this will only work if you make money on Shabbat. For reference, I’m 1000% agnostic but I belong to orthodox shuls.

UPDATE: I sort of kept Shabbat this week. By that I mean, I did not work or spend money or most of the melachos. Some I’m really not perfect at but I know them. But I was able to rethink my budget and have opted to do gig work Tu/Th/Su so that I can start keeping Shabbat! Thank you to everyone who encouraged me to think about my parnassah. Shavua Tov!

• Zohar