Press "Enter" to skip to content

Well, I guess it’s time to go…

I’ve been a member of Chabad off and on for 22 years. I was invited to shabbat by a black hatter in a book store, so I went, and I liked it. I was a totally secular Mexican & Anglo crypto Jew learning more about my identity. And it turned out to be something I embraced.

I fell in love and married a woman who isn’t Jewish. I mean, who knows, but she’s not from a Jewish family. We have 2 children, a boy and girl, 10 & 12, who have autism, who I’ve raised in a Jewish home, having separated from their mother. And I do my best with them, and to keep kosher, to teach them Judaism to the best of their understanding, and above all, teach them how to treat others. We’re not a typical Jewish trio, but we identify and embrace.

Now, I’ve been more active in the past couple of years at Chabad, which has helped immensely. I mean, the support is on the money.

My daughter is a nationally recognized artist who can’t tell time. My son is non verbal but has a pattern recognition IQ of 210. I don’t understand how these things are possible, but this is who we are.

My kids have a really hard time making friends. They prefer to be alone, but I take them out to be around other kids and they do their best. They’re working on it.

I don’t pressure them too much about Judaism, because religion and culture are things they don’t look at like I do. And I respect that. However, it’s my job to guide them, and I do my best with the help of many people.

I asked my daughter how she would feel about a program called JUDA that Chabad has for kids. Judaism Through the Arts. I said she could spend some time with some girls her age and, well, as it says, learn some Judaism by doing some art with other girls. And my little girl smiled and blushed, and said yeah, she’d like to try that. Well, damn. I should’ve asked the Rabbi before I asked my daughter.

As it turns out, as we support each other, my daughter isn’t welcome. Ya know, because of the Jewish status of the mother.

Everyone, I’ve never been so heartbroken over an email. I’m not here to shame anyone, because over time I came to understand what culture and being Jewish means at Chabad. I could have avoided this heartbreak. I own my part in it. I chose to follow this path. But, what? I mean, I’m looking straight into the Rebbe’s eyes on my wall, that smile on his face, and my head is empty. My whole body feels heavy and numb. What have I been doing?

I see it as an intervention, more than anything. As humans and parents and Jews we’re either never doing enough or always doing too much. Baruch Hashem.

The reason I joined Chabad was because of Chabad, and I find myself leaving for the same reason. It seems the fence around Torah isn’t defined by G-d, it’s defined by those would say they understand the incomprehensible. So be it.

We’ll carry on, we’re a tough crew. And my kids will go on to do great things, and light up the world. And I’ll be ok. I mean we might me a small population, but we find each other. Selah. 🔥

submitted by /u/justsomedude1111
[link] [comments]
Source: Reditt