Question about conversion and gemara

I’ve been wanting to convert Orthodox for a while now but I’ve been putting it off because the idea of going to a rabbi is intimidating. I’ve emailed a couple times but they never respond. I don’t know if God is telling me not to convert or I’m just not trying hard enough. I’ve been watching shiurim online, mostly mussar, and the rabbi mentioned that in the gemara it says that a convert who delays conversion once they’ve decided that’s what they want to do is punished. It would explain a lot of what’s happening in my life right now, can anyone confirm this? He didn’t give a page number and I can only really search in Google but I can’t find anything about it. Thank you.