I don’t even know where to begin.
I have no issue observing Jewish laws and customs. The structure adds comfort to my life. It feels nice to uphold traditions that we’ve had for thousands of years.
Currently, I live in a household that selectively follows a few things. When I finish my university, I would like to move out, finally move to Israel for non-religious reasons, and be able to keep shabbat and kashrut more strictly.
The problem is that I don’t pray. I feel like a fraud with prayer because I’m not sure I believe the words I’m saying. It’s not that I don’t believe in Hashem. I do. I think all the laws of physics and mathematics are too perfect for them to be accidental. Maybe I just have a hard time believing in all the details. Either way, it’s been an embarrassingly long time since I’ve been in a synagogue.
Rules are simpler. Refraining from electronics on shabbat doesn’t bother me. It seems healthy even. On the other hand, praying without faith feels wrong. I have the option of blindly reciting words in Hebrew without knowing what they mean, or I learn their meaning, and they somehow feel more foreign.
I kind of end up in a situation where I observe mitzvot without prayer. I was just wondering what your thoughts are on this.
submitted by /u/Downtown_Society_594