What does Judaism think of asexuality? Obviously we have the mitzvah of Pru U’rbu (be fruitful and multiply) but what if it’s what’s holding you back from forming a long-lasting relationship? I’m asexual, female, nearing 30 and want a life partner, maybe kids, but dating apps are terrifying because it seems like all men want is sex right away. I’m not averse to doing the deed with the right person eventually, but it’s certainly not something I’m missing in my life right now. I feel like it’s easier for orthodox people (I grew up orthodox but no longer practice) since there is no expectation of sexual intimacy until the wedding (at least how it was when I was growing up in Israel). I guess I’m just wondering how to go about the secular (but Jewish) dating scene and navigating that inherent expectation of intercourse. Obviously it would be ideal to find another asexual Jew but the chances of that happening are probably slim to none. My parents don’t know I’m asexual and have been on my back for years about getting married and having children, and as the clock is ticking, I’m starting to feel that time is running out for me to find a fulfilling, loving relationship. So any advice or insight is much appreciated.
Thanks and soon Chodesh Tov!