It’s late on the east coast and I’m probably not going to look at the responses until morning. That said, these sorts of thoughts come up at night so I figured now is the time to write them down. I also have a habit of unintentionally writing novels so I’ll keep this as short as I can. It’s gonna be a rambling mess.
I’ve been feeling… bad.. lately. Like really bad. And I know I shouldn’t be. It isn’t right. I have a nice place, my career is doing well. I mean, fuck work in general.. but the money is there. I’m not starving.
But due to some lingering issues from childhood, and other things.. I occasionally slump into periods of shit. For the past few years I’ve been doing good.. but now I feel worse than I ever have. I feel like unresolved issues are catching up with me. Due to certain social anxiety issues and trust issues I can’t really find a woman to be with long term. I’m getting older and honestly feel like I’m going to die alone. I have a small friend group, yet they’re all slowly getting occupied with their own things. We’re growing distant. I just want to love more than anything else, yet the window of opportunity is closing.
And in general I just feel.. garbage. Like.. I go to work, go to the gym, watch Netflix and pass out on the couch. I can’t bring myself to get hobbies. Interacting is hard and I don’t have much energy. I waste all that energy during the day.
So basically… I need to know why you think G-d exists. Because I need something right now. I need him. I never really believed in him but I need him. Please tell me how you convince yourself to believe.
Disclaimers: Yes, I’m in therapy. I’ve sort of stopped going for years because I felt better about things but I’m gonna go back. No, I’m not going to do anything stupid. But damn it do I not feel good right now.
Point blank: Is G-d there and how do you know? And can you prove it?
submitted by /u/KnakheMacher
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Source: Reditt