I went home with this guy from my uni tonight, not intending to do anything sexual, just to spend time with him. He shut the door, and started kissing me, and I just kind of relented and let it happen. I could have easily said no I think, but I didn’t.
I want to do teshuvah for this, but I don’t know how, seeing as I just can’t bring myself to regret it. I’m still a teenager and I want to have been able to have happy memories of my youth. And I just can’t bring myself to stop seeing guys, even though I know how big of an aveirah it is.