How can I get something out of synagogue during high holidays?

34 single M here. I’ve always resented going. Getting up early, uncomfortable clothing, being indoors on a beautiful day. But it’s always been so much deeper than that.

I honestly feel my parents only go to see who’s not there and to judge. Well, my mom is a member of the “sistahood” so there’s a social aspect for her.

I just don’t see the point. Chanting in a language that I don’t understand, and when I do read the translation it’s “God is good, lambs blood sacred god blah blah”. I know, “just don’t go”. And catch so much guilt and shame from my parents.

Therefore, how can I make the most of it? How can I be positive? I am very proud to be Jewish but it’s all cultural. Can I get some constructive advice? Thank you.