Guilt for not observing Yom Kippur.

How does one deal with guilt from parents, friends, family, or others for not observing the holidays?

I am Jewish and have lived an Ultra-orthodox yeshiva life until middle of high-school where I became completely disillusioned from the religion. I went to Israel, regained my belief, and then upon moving back into my family home for financial reasons, I am now once again completely irreligious because I am not allowed to observe how I want. If I try to do so, I get belittled and treated like my views aren’t important. If I am not downstairs for Kapparot, supposedly I am not doing anything important (???).

My parents obviously don’t respect my values and getting them to recognize them is a whole seperate discussion.

I’ve gotten to the point where I emotionally distance myself from those who treat me this way, because I can’t live like that. I’m also completely irreligious because I cannot observe how I feel is right. I must do things the way everyone else does. So it is easier to do nothing than to observe my way and recieve contempt.

My therapist agrees with me and says I definitely need to get out of my home ASAP. I am doing my best to save up money to move out, but let’s be honest, living in NY as a college student is a financial nightmare. I pay for my own food, and my own transportation to and from school. The only thing my parents provide is housing.

Does anyone else deal with something similar? How do you all deal with religious people guilting you to be a certain way? Maybe I can hear from the other side of this. Are you a parent who used to make your children feel bad for not observing the way you like? if so, why? How can I try to talk to them about this?