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Gatekeeping in Judiasm

Jew here, serious question. Why is there so much gatekeeping in Judaism as a whole toward the practices of other Jews and where did it come from historically?

Some Jews want to have a woman rabbi? Not real Jews. Some Jews don’t want to keep kosher, not real Jews. “Jew by choice” through a reform temple? Not real Jews.

Why is there such hostility in Judaism towards the practices of other Jews and gatekeeping of the religion? If anything we should know what’s it’s like to be ostracized and judged by others, so why is it so prevalent and accepted to be done by jews towards Jews?

Just because my mothers vagina was Jewish doesn’t make me, or anyone else the arbiter of what Judaism is. So why so much judgment and hostility internally towards others and where has it come from historically?

Not trying to generalize or talking about anyone specific but it’s defiantly something that’s become more prevalent, or vocal over the last few decades.

Sorry if this question isn’t allowed. Plz delete if so.

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