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Existential Depression

I am a 23 y/o female, recently becoming more religious but did not have a strong religious focus in my younger life.

Recently I have been dealing with severe existential depression & anticipatory grief, to the extent that I do not think I will ever feel happiness again, because the thoughts of death, losing loved ones, and leaving loved ones are so crippling and paralyzing. I’m not sure whether leaning into my religion will bring me any comfort, especially since Judaism does not propose in an afterlife (not that I believe in this anyways). But I would like to believe in a soul; not sure that I do. I am just curious as to what the Jewish approach to severe existential depression would be? I think what bothers me most is feeling a disconnect between myself and those I love so deeply because ultimately our bonds will be permanently severed when one of us leaves this world.

As someone deeply depressed and struggling severely right now, I ask that you are sensitive to that in your responses and try to avoid sentiments that may trigger the depression even worse; I’ve already encountered a lot of that on the internet and emotionally cannot handle it right now.

submitted by /u/Primary_1000
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Source: Reditt