Dating as a convert- Rant :)

So, I converted conservative a year ago. When I was in the early stages of converting, I decided I wanted to marry another jew and have a jewish family. I don’t advertise that I’m a convert, because I don’t think it should matter, but it’s not something to keep from a potential partner. Dating (or trying to date) jewish boys has not been a fun time.

It feels like most the time they have some issue with my conversion. I was seeing one guy I really liked until one day he randomly said “our kids would technically be jewish, but not really. You’d be diluting the bloodline”. I wish I was kidding.

The same thing just happened. I started going on casual dates with a guy who I thought didn’t care that I was a convert. He asked me to convert orthodox, and when I said no he told me I wouldn’t really be a jew without an orthodox conversion. He’s not even orthodox!

I’ve also been asked to show my papers proving that I converted. I’ve been told “I’ve never met a convert who wasn’t really weird, but you seem chill”. I’m just over it. UGH. I’m starting to feel like I should give up on dating jews until I can move somewhere with a bigger jewish population. Or maybe I’ll finally let the sweet old ladies at shul set me up with their grandsons.

I was venting to my non-jewish mother about this on the phone last night and she said, “You’re bi, just switch teams and start dating jewish girls instead”. So at least I gotta good laugh out of that.

EDIT: I don’t want this to be taken as a jab at orthodox jews. I’m just personally not interested in orthodoxy and I’m very happy being a conservative jew. I’m not worried about not being seen as jewish by orthodox standards, I don’t go into orthodox spaces for that reason.

I also understand if people are hesitant because my family isn’t jewish. My parents aren’t religious, but my dad’s side of the family almost completely cut me off because of my conversion. Family get a little messy, but I would never take a jewish SO around family who would try to convert them. That’s something to have a conversation about. That’s not what this rant was about.